The king of pop is dead.

Michael Jackson is no more.
Its sad.
But I hope he's feeling better where he is now.


I have been listening to his songs on youtube several days now and Im thinking about buying all the records of him (though I have "Dangerous"). I dont think I have ever appreciated him more then now. Its sad how you start to really appreciate a person when its too late.
I have always liked his music and his dancing. He may have been my first inspiration to dance. He was my big Idol when I went to 2nd and 3rd grade and when they play his music in the clubs it always raises my mood and takes my wanting to dance to the next level.
But then all the rumors came and created speculation. What do one really know about the happenings in the mansion of his? Maybe hes innocent like a child but tragically damaged because of the horrible childhood and cant help himself. Doesnt know his limits and cant control his impulses...or something. I wish it wouldnt be true. But they say there's no smoke without fire.
Recently though...one of the boys came out and came clean, telling the world the truth about it all and asked for forgiveness (though too late of course). It turned out that the boys' father made up the story and preassured his son to say it out of the reason of profitting. Milked the previous rumor for all its worth. So sad what people do for money...

All this videowatching ...
I must say Im a little inlove with him at the moment. He was such a fascinating person. Two different persons really...This entertainment god on the stage, fiery and wicked. And then the withdrawn, shy, sweet talking, humble, allmost girly person behind the curtain. Very insecure of himself, something that wasnt appearent at all infront of an audience. He was a perfectionist. A workoholic. With a childs fascination for fantasy and magic (stray thought..I wonder if he ever read harry potter. I believe he would have liked it alot.) and carnival rides. A great love and recognition in children and animals. Very caring and giving. Concerned about the worlds injustices. Pure...innocent. And very lonely.

But I wonder what was going on inside of him. What his inner life was like, his deeper desires and dreams.
Because..the two personalities are so far from eachother. It doesnt make sence.
On stage he was on fire! So expressive. Even agressive. Not a single hesitasion. He ruled the stage like a king. He took place like a king. He performed like a king. And presented himself like a king (not litterally).
And his creativeness, his uniqueness is out of this world. Unbelievably musical and talented in rythm and dancing. An inspiration. Something the world never before have seen and probably never will again. An extraordinary person in the true sence of the word.

I dont know what more to say.

Im not a person who regularly worships famous people.
But If I'd have an idol it'd be him.
For sure.


(did I mention we are both virgo with ascendant in libra? :P)

Rest in peace, Michael J.