The conversation turned horribly wrong.

I said something compleatly unnecessary, hurting and stupid. I exagerated to hurt him, cause I felt hurt too.
I overdid it.
An incredibly stupid thing to do.

"FUCK YOU"
was his response.

Im too messed up inside that I hurt the one closest to me.

____

Once again I feel like Im gonna end up all alone in this world.
In the end, Im the only one I got to turn to.
The momentarily bliss I experienced two years ago, when I thought I'd found someone to share everything with. Someone to see me for who I am and love me for it. Someone who knew me and understood me. It's all fading...

I can't stop letting him down. I can't help myself. I cant HELP myself. And it drags me under...
and it pulls him away from me.
I want to be strong for him.
I need to be.
He deserves someone strong and brilliant.
Somehow I always knew I wasnt good enough.

___________
Im sorry for all these dark feelings. But I always seam to write here when Im feeling the lowest.